Updated the personal information page with reviewed text from legal counsel. Fixes issue ietf-tools#2503.

 - Legacy-Id: 15094

Author: levkowetz

ietf/templates/help/personal-information.html

@@ -14,67 +14,79 @@ <h1>Personal Information in the Datatracker</h1>
      the goal and the mission of the IETF as follows:
    </p>
 
-     <samp class="preformatted small">   The goal of the IETF is to make the Internet work better.
+   <samp class="preformatted small">   The goal of the IETF is to make the Internet work better.
 
    The mission of the IETF is to produce high quality, relevant
    technical and engineering documents that influence the way people
    design, use, and manage the Internet in such a way as to make the
    Internet work better.  These documents include protocol standards,
    best current practices, and informational documents of various kinds.
-     </samp>
+   </samp>
+
+   <!-- *** NOTE ***
+
+   The following text has been reviewed by legal counsel (Thomas Zych)
+   on Thu, 26 Apr 2018 17:24:03 -0400
+
+   *** DO NOT CHANGE WITHOUT LEGAL REVIEW ***
+   -->
 
    <p>
 
-     In order to fulfil its mission, the IETF provides ways to distribute
-     drafts, discuss them, ballot them, and otherwise process them to the
-     point where they are considered ready for publication.
+     In order to fulfil its mission, the IETF provides various ways to distribute
+     and discuss Internet-Drafts, and otherwise process them until there is
+     consensus that they are ready for publication.
 
    </p>
    <p>
 
-     This makes the information in the draft documents, as well as
-     contributions related to the draft documents and their processing, as
+     This makes the information in the content of the draft documents, as well
+     as contributions related to the draft documents and their processing as
      laid out in the "<a href="https://www.ietf.org/about/note-well/">Note
      Well</a>" statement, of legitimate interest to the IETF when it pursues
      its mission; not only in general terms, but specifically under Article
-     6(1)&nbsp;f) of <a href="https://eur-lex.europa.eu/legal-content/EN/TXT/HTML/?uri=CELEX:32016R0679#d1e1888-1-1">
+     6(1)&nbsp;f) of
+     <a href="https://eur-lex.europa.eu/legal-content/EN/TXT/HTML/?uri=CELEX:32016R0679#d1e1888-1-1">
      EU's General Data Protection Regulation </a>.
 
    </p>
    <p>
 
      The datatracker treats all personal information derived from draft documents and
-     documents published as RFC accordingly, as well as personal information derived from
-     processing draft documents through the IETF process.  This includes author names,
+     documents published as RFC, as well as personal information derived from
+     processing draft documents through the IETF procedures, in accordance with
+     applicable law, including the GDPR.  This includes author names,
      email addresses and other address information provided in draft documents or as
      contact information for IETF roles such as Working Group chairs, secretaries,
      Area Directors and other roles.
 
    </p>
    <p>
 
-     There is however personal information held in the datatracker which
-     is not considered covered by Legitimate Interest.  This information
-     requires Consent for its storage and processing, and the person it
-     relates to may at any time request its removal.  This includes:
+     There is however additional personal information held in the datatracker that
+     is used for other purposes. This information requires the consent of the
+     individuals whose information is stored and processed which IETF secures
+     through various means, and the person it relates to may at any time request
+     its correction or removal. This includes:
 
    </p>
 
    <ul>
-     <li>Personal photo</li>
-     <li>Personal biography</li>
-     <li>Personal email addresses not derived from IETF contributions</li>
+     <li>Personal photograph or other likeness;</li>
+     <li>Personal biography;</li>
+     <li>Personal email addresses not derived from IETF contributions; and </li>
      <li>Personal account login information</li>
    </ul>
 
    <p>
 
-     Most of this information can be edited on their <a
-     href="/accounts/profile/">Account Info</a> page by anybody with an
+     Most of this information can be edited on the individual's 
+     <a href="/accounts/profile/">Account Info</a> page by anybody with an
      account.  If the datatracker holds such information about a person, and
      they don't have an account, a request to the <a
      href="mailto:ietf-action@ietf.org">IETF secretariat</a> to change or
-     remove the information will be honoured.
+     remove the information will be honoured to the extent feasible and legally
+     permitted.
 
    </p>